Fast Food Blues

My plan for this summer is to work as much as possible to save up money for fall semester -- potentially my last semester of college. (Yes, Mom, you read that right. Last. Semester. Of College.) Not wanting to leave any stones unturned, I am applying for as many places as I can think of, and that is how, as a soon-to-be college graduate, I have just applied for a job . . . at Burger King. What can I say. Sometimes life hurts. In the spirit of seeking commiseration, I present to you what I wrote (but did not send) in response to the questions, "Why do you want to work at Burger King?" and "What sets you apart from other candidates?"

Why Do I Want to Work at Burger King?
by Meagan Toiaivao

Why do I want to work at Burger King? I don't. Obviously. But as broke as I am, if it means a paycheck -- any kind of paycheck -- then I'm ready to do my time flipping burgers. There are plenty of jobs out there just as soulless and menial as trying to push French fries on haggard mothers through sheer force of pep, although granted, none of them are quite so iconic in their ignominy. Janitors have more dignity than fast food employees. Garbage collectors have more dignity. Even telemarketers do. At least all of them get to be anonymous. And as for what sets me apart from other candidates, how about, I'm in college? How about, I'm sanitary? How outstanding do I need to be to put a sandwich in a paper sack? If I actually submitted this in my application, would that set me apart sufficiently?

I had a fun time writing this. Comments and editorial suggestions welcome. Have a fun summer, everybody.